I honestly didn’t even know there was such a thing as energetic boundaries until I recognized the need for them in my body. This training program in which I’m currently enrolled is pushing me in ways I’ve never been pushed before, or I’m a lot more in tune and have the ability to notice more easily.
Essentially the feeling is that of all (or most) of my energy leaving me and entering into the other, typically during conversation. As the other person speaks, I’m drawn into their words, feelings and situation. Sometimes it causes me angst; other times higher emotions, but always I am IN the experience — no separation between them and me. I’m in the process of catching and working with it in the moment, a task that has been difficult in the past. In fact, there are lots of parts of me that were inaccessible just one year ago, because of a dis-regulated nervous system. But since embarking on a nervous system healing journey early last year, much is revealing itself — not all at once, but in layers.
I now see that I didn’t have access, or the ability to even see it in the past. I also don’t know why or where it stems from. I am working with a somatic experiencing practitioner to hopefully understand its origin, and to learn to work with the felt sensations in concrete healing ways. It is simple and yet difficult work. The practices are ‘simple’ in instruction; the noticing of the felt sense is sometimes difficult, but I’m starting to see that the difficulty is because my nervous system always wants to override the natural built-in capacity of my soma, my deepest body that lives in a ‘delicious yes’ with my soul. As I continue to document the journey, I’ll record practices here too.
If you’re reading this and it resonates, please reach out. I know I cannot be alone, although it often feels that way. Wow. This journey. This life. Never boring. I am grateful.