• being human,  embodiment,  writing

    Learning to Live in Direct Experience

    I’ve gone quiet lately. Last week was busy with work and graduation prep and the weekend was full with my girl’s graduation ceremony and party. Yesterday was the first day I journaled in a few weeks. And it struck me … I wasn’t writing because I didn’t want to fully feel, didn’t want to acknowledge the sadness that was here, under the surface. Anxiety was here. Angst was here. I felt it all. I’m much more in tune than I ever have been before, but I filled life up instead of slowing down to fully experience it. I think most of us do that, sometimes out of habit, others necessity, and sometimes we’re completely unaware. I am not saying we should drown in our fears, sadness or anxiety, but I do think we often mask it or avoid the negative feelings in lieu of the goodness of life. We are human; our emotions make us human, and I think avoiding the full range of that limits our ability to live a rich, full life. If we push the bad away and only try to experience the good, when will the good simply not be good enough anymore? And if all we ever do is fill…

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    A Word for 2019

    I’m convinced that most of us don’t know what the hell we’re doing here, on this earth, in this time. We think we know, then it all falls apart, and when it falls apart, we often defer to old (destructive) habits instead of digging deeper. One step forward, two steps back. That's been my pattern. I’d ‘do the work,’ then sink in despair, and the cycle would repeat. After about two ‘dark night of the soul’ YEARS, I’d had enough. I had a breakthrough at Christmastime, on a trip away from home. I can’t define the event, but the ensuing thoughts were, ‘this is my life, WTF am I doing?’

  • writing

    Fulfillment Comes When We Live On Purpose

    My mornings are sacred—hot tea, meditation, reflection, gratitude practice, reading, journaling. Its my favorite part of every day & I am ‘off’ if I go too many days without this time. Its a ritual I started about ten years ago as I began to teach yoga, and I’m so glad i did.

  • being human,  writing

    Craving Depth

    I crave deep conversations with people who are real, wholly and unapologetically themselves, people who listen with their hearts and share what's inside of them, without fear of judgement, knowing the same will be reflected back. I don’t have much patience for casual meaningless conversation & ‘chitchat.’ I wish I did. I’d probably be more likable. Instead, I crave deep conversations & meaning, and I was blessed to have two interactions like this yesterday ... one with a friend (who also happens to be my amazing massage therapist) and another with a new colleague at OU. I shared parts of me that I don’t share with just anyone & they did the same. There was deep listening, reflection & heart connection.

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    It is Time to Trust

    I've been walking this path for a long time now. I've been trusting (and not trusting) myself for a long time now. It's funny looking back over the years. I wanted to become a yoga teacher, so I did. I wanted to solely teach yoga, so I did. I wanted to write a book, so I did. I wanted to stop writing that book and change direction, so I did. I wanted to stop teaching yoga and focus solely on writing, so I did. I have manifested many things into my life, almost effortlessly, it seems, though I know that's not entirely true. I've worked hard. I've had setbacks, and I'm still here, more committed than ever to my path.

  • being human,  writing

    Conscious Writing

    I've been a technical writer, content strategist and copywriter for the bulk of my professional career. It's not what I planned; it just happened. But as I look back at my college days I see the seeds. Getting older offers the gift of clear-er seeing. When I began teaching yoga over a decade ago, I felt a distinct pull to do more personal writing -- for myself and others. That practice has been a mainstay ever since. I'm calmer and more focused in the process. I understand myself in a deeper way. I see how my thoughts work (for and against me). Personal writing -- conscious writing -- makes me more me. For about the last five years I've wanted to author a book, not because it's what I want to do professionally (I like my job), but because it's a bucket list item I want to check off. I want to call myself an author. Is that dumb? Maybe, but it's the truth. And I've discovered that reason is not good enough. I actually wrote a book during my yoga teaching years but never published it. I've been trying to get it over the finish line for the last year but it's not in…

  • being human,  writing

    bright

    oh my darling don’t you see? none of this is real these thoughts those emotions all of the self loathing you shine; why are you dimming your brightness? you are the stars the moon heaven in physical form. . . . Photo by mari lezhava on Unsplash

  • being human,  writing

    The Power of a Morning Ritual

    Ever reach the end of the day and wonder where it went? Do you feel exhausted by lunchtime? Or feel like all you do is run around catering for others when you get home from work? Family, school, work and extracurricular activities fall top of the priority for most of us. But what about you? Shouldn’t YOU be at the top of YOUR list too? How are you meeting your self-care needs?  “I don’t have time,” or “I guess I never really thought about it,” are the top answers I hear the most with my students and clients. My immediate response? “If you aren’t taking care of yourself, how well you are really taking care of everyone else?” Constantly going, working from a never-ending to do list without any rest is taxing on the autonomic nervous system (ANS). Our bodies are beautifully designed to achieve balance and the ANS is a fine example of it. On one side is the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) which elicits a ‘rest and digest’ response, and the opposite is the sympathetic nervous system (SNS), aka the “fight or flight” response that automatically kicks in during an emergency or a crisis. Unfortunately, in our Western culture, many of us constantly…