• being human,  writing

    What You Think of Me is None of My Business

    I woke up this morning with a sense of dread, a feeling I am not unfamiliar with. The ‘dread’ was (is) worry . . . about what others think of me, specifically over the book I just published. It’s a normal human emotion, I think. It’s also worth dismantling. Publishing a book has been on my bucket list for at least the last decade, maybe two, and when I took a course last year on the publishing process, I decided to publish poetry that I wrote during a volatile time. I wrote these poems and called them ‘Love Letters for the Soul’ because that is exactly what they were to me, love letters for MY soul. . . . In them you’ll read about a scared, unsure, deeply sad yet hopeful little girl talking herself out of every bad thing, every negative emotion, every…

  • being human,  reading,  writing

    January Books Read

    As I wrote in a previous post, I have a goal of reading 108 books and/or literary essays this year. Besides the ongoing books I’m reading throughout the year (which were listed in that post), here is a list of books and essays read in January 2021: Dear Ijeawele or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Pray, Decide and Don’t Worry: Bobby & Jackie Angel with Mike Schmitz In the School of the Holy Spirit: Jacques Philippe Praying the Rosary Like Never Before: Edward Sri We Should All Be Feminists: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Stitches: Anne Lamott Intimations: Zadie Smith The Naked Now: Richard Rohr Turn My Mourning Into Dancing: Henri Nouwen Liturgy of the Ordinary: Tish Harrison Warren A Healing Space: Matt Licata Seven Brief Lessons on Physics: Carlo Rovelli On Likability: Lacy M. Johnson Obituary for Dead Languages: Heather Altfeld…

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    The Whispers of My Soul

    Little by little, we are led toward our final destination, and yet words fail. ‘Final destination’ is not a reality for earth. To coin a phrase I recently heard and like a lot, we are ‘always on the way.’ This phrase, for me, means continued growth, an uncovering of my true nature, that of love. The problem here on the earth-plane is that of forgetting, at least that’s been my experience. I have been a writer for the entirety of my adult life and most of my childhood, if I’m being honest. I’ve made my living writing for others, but as I started my yoga journey, I deeply felt the need to write for myself. I started a (different) blog back then and wrote thousands of words for myself and others. These were words from my heart, passion for new things I was learning…

  • being human,  embodiment,  reading,  writing

    2021 Reading Goal

    Yesterday I wrote about my goals for 2021 and one of my biggest ones is to read more books. Specifically, my goal is to read 108 books. I have set this goal for myself every year—reading more, not 108–this is the most ever. With my intention to lessen social media (and a pretty good follow through so far), I am making excellent progress. Everyday reading is becoming a habit. I have read ten books in full so far and I have five that I’ll be reading throughout 2021. Each month I plan to list the books I’ve read. Below are the year-long books on my shelf: The Book of Awakening: Mark Nepo Do Something Beautiful for God: thoughts from Mother Teresa Radiance Sutras: Lorin Roche The Cloud of Unknowing: Unknown A Calendar of Wisdom: Leo Tolstoy I will list the other ten (and any…

  • being human,  embodiment,  reading,  writing

    Goals for a New Year

    For many years now I have set personal and professional goals at the beginning of each year. I did so again this year but they look much different from years’ past. I have ALWAYS had something to prove, the result of a not-enoughness mindset. Thankfully much of my life’s inner work has been about seeing/understanding not-enoughness, the insideous ways it shows itself, and dismantling its ugly manifestations. I never would have had the courage to publish Love Letters for the Soul without doing so. I don’t have to be the best at anything. I only have to be myself. So while I still think it’s important to set goals and work toward them, my stance has softened. To me, life has shifted from acheiving goals at some far-off date to paying greater attention to how I’m living today. My goals for this year are…

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    Optimistic Energy

    Optimistic energy attracts all good things because it believes those things are already on their way. In fact they are. Optimistic energy is a felt sensation in the body as much as it is a mindset (maybe more). Optimistic energy is expansive and contagious. Optimistic energy comes directly from spirit. Optimistic energy must stay present to itself in order to attract more optimistic energy. Optimistic energy sees the good in all. Even the ugly. Optimistic energy is a byproduct of love. Optimistic energy is the opposite of fear. . . . Fear is unbelief. Fear is a belief in lack. Fear is lack, not-enoughness, ego, limitation, reaction, a lack of love. Fear stops us from being our best selves, living our best lives. Fear has a felt sense too. It is different for everyone but there is always constriction in fear. . . .…

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    An Invitation

    I find myself in a place I know well—a place of seeking less, a place of letting go, a place of learning to simplify. It’s a place I know well because I return to it regularly, mostly because I forget along the way. Life, it seems to me, is a series of forgetting and remembering—even some of our core qualities, the essence of who we are and who we want to be in the world. In my life I’ve had major periods of growth as well as stretches of lifeless living—periods of time where I’ve been completely disconnected from who I am and where I’m going. Life changes all the time but while some of the change is initiated from within, from a knowing place, other times it is unconscious. I’m pretty sure I’m in a period of being fully (mostly) connected to life…

  • being human,  writing

    Learning to Wait

    I am learning to wait, hopefully patiently. For the majority of my adult life I have pushed and strived and made things happen. I have set goals and conquered them. But I’m in a different place now, a place quite unfamiliar to me. I am in a place of quiet anticipation. I am teaching myself to wait. Sounds simple enough, right? Sure, yeah—no, it doesn’t feel simple at all. In this waiting period, I am noticing my compulsions and tendencies. I am noticing how much mindless scrolling I do as well as the tendency to pick up my phone for …. something, but what? I do not know. I just announced a break from social media today, something I’ve been thinking about for a while but have not had the courage to do. And how crazy is that? It literally feels like it is…

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    Writing for Peace; Writing for Posterity

    I have been proving my existence through the written word for as long as I can remember—keeping diaries, journals, common place books, writing lists, poems, letters and more. It’s a deep need and desire within me and yet I cannot fully express the why of it, except that it brings me peace. But there is more to it than that. I wish I was one of those people who just lived and didn’t question my why’s, but if that was the case, I wouldn’t be me. And damn it, I love me now, finally, so I will learn to love that this is the way God made me. I really questioned my why of writing after my mom’s passing. It grew to an ever deeper need in the weeks, months and years following her earthly exit as I realized I had no words of…

  • being human,  embodiment,  studio sage,  writing

    New Moon Intentions

    I have set new moon intentions every month for many years now, but they look much different these days: there are fewer and they are smaller, more embodied, life-giving intentions instead of goals. Here are my intentions for the month ahead as we enter winter solstice: THEME: Do Small Things with Great Love. INTENTIONS: Everyday presence. Fully connecting with my life. Embodying it. Movement. Outside. A grounded sense of calm. Non-profit research and knowledge for The Studio Sage. Yay! (This is my one big goal for the month.) Daily spiritual reading. Respect the season: daily quietude, lots of sleep, less screen time, more reading, slow yoga, conscious breath, staying home and cooking more. What about you? Do you set monthly new moon intentions? Happy Season of Yin, y’all. Time to go within. Be still. I’m here for it!