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Learning to Be Gentle
I have felt so aggravated and unsettled lately, and it’s caused me to be a bit stern with myself. Why do you feel this way, Heather? Why are you making problems where none exists? Why can’t you just be happy? But this narrative is not helpful, and its time for a change. We are having trees taken down in our meadow, an adjacent property we bought early last year with the intention of folding it into our farm business. We call it the meadow because it’s the most wide open space where we live; we’re covered in trees otherwise. But the meadow is the perfect place for a huge garden. It’s already open and the pine trees that are being cut will make it an even more open space to let the sunshine in. The problem? It’s unsettled me (and has sorta pissed me…
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Dancing with the Divine
A few days ago the picture of me below popped up on my Facebook memories. It was from eleven years ago. I look good in it; happy. And it got me thinking. Eleven years isn’t that long ago, and at the same time, it feels like a lifetime ago. I was in my early forties and my daughter was only eleven—exactly half the age she is now. I don’t look back very often. I can’t read old journals; it depresses me. I don’t like thinking about how things were. I’m much more of a forward moving person. I think about how things used to be, and I thank God for the way things are now. Thinking about today and tomorrow always feels better in my body than thinking about what was. I find this interesting. But … I do see the value in looking…
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The Divine Elements
Dear Embodied God … Who Walked Among Us, Who Was With Us, Who Is With Us, Who Was Us, Who Is Us, in a certain sense … Please show us what it means to be human, to be fully human, to live full human lives, instead of the shadow lives we often limit ourselves to. Please help us to stop, look, continue or pivot, based on what we see. Please grant us Divine Seeing so we may know and trust our sight. Dear God, my own human embodiment tends toward the rush. She tends toward anxiety, overthinking, shame, and sometimes stagnation. While shame makes me not want to name these things, I know that in the naming I am set free. Please continue to show me how these things aren’t from you, and please grace me with the gifts that are of your essence:…
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We Have Forgotten
We have forgotten how to be human. We have forgotten what it means to be human. We have forgotten ourselves and what it feels like to be human. We have forgotten each other and the natural world. Now that I’m about a year into my nervous system regulating journey, and many years in spiritual devotion, life — real life — is coming back online. (And to be honest, I think the only time it was ever online for me prior to this was when I was a baby, when I was pre-verbal. I suspect this to be the case with most of us, unless our parents were fully realized while raising us.) I keep having revelations about life, and what I see is that nothing is real in the state of the world these days. Capitalism, the patriarchy and Western civilization, in general, have…
