• being human,  embodiment,  gratitude,  love letters for the soul

    Let’s Be Amazing Together!

    I have had many mini epiphanies about life since Christmas. Internal shifts that needed to happen, happened. I’d say ‘the old Heather is back,’ but that's not really true. Something brand new is being birthed and I’m loving it/her. So much of life has been really f*cking hard for two f*cking years, but I had to go through it to get here. I wasn’t sure i’d teach again. Now I know I will. In fact, I'm teaching now, just not in the same way I did before. I trust myself so much more than ever. I’m stronger than i thought possible. 

  • being human,  embodiment,  writing

    It is Time to Trust

    I've been walking this path for a long time now. I've been trusting (and not trusting) myself for a long time now. It's funny looking back over the years. I wanted to become a yoga teacher, so I did. I wanted to solely teach yoga, so I did. I wanted to write a book, so I did. I wanted to stop writing that book and change direction, so I did. I wanted to stop teaching yoga and focus solely on writing, so I did. I have manifested many things into my life, almost effortlessly, it seems, though I know that's not entirely true. I've worked hard. I've had setbacks, and I'm still here,…

  • being human,  gratitude,  rituals

    Letting Go

    "letting go doesn't mean forgetting; it means we stop carrying the energy of the past into the present" (yung pueblo) Yes, yes and more yes; this resonates deeply but how do we actually DO IT? From my experience, it seems something 'just happens,' a shift suddenly occurs OR we struggle for so long that we eventually must ritualize a new energy into our consciousness ... we must physically do something different, poetic, scary, out-of-character.

  • being human,  embodiment

    Learning to Remember

    We get so busy living that we forget. We never stop. We uphold our importance. We don't see the big picture. We live as though this is the only day, as though this (fill in the blank) is all that matters. We take ourselves so seriously. If we can learn to stop, or at least slow down; widen our experience, recognize that we are a drop in the ocean, a piece of the puzzle instead of the whole puzzle, life will make a lot more sense.

  • being human

    Focus on Healing Over Hurting

    The last part of this week has been hard. I've had a relationship in need of repair and some things came to a head. I can't fix what's broken, not alone anyway. I can't control the other person and we're not seeing life in the same way. To make things worse, this is a primary relationship; we've always been close. I am and always will be invested. The situation has led to deep introspection of self and other, and in looking at things objectively, I recognize that when we are hurt, we project our feelings onto others. Personally, I try to communicate my way though difficulty, but that's not always the answer. Its…

  • being human

    Calling Bullsh*t on the Bullsh*t

    I've always loved this quote by Anais Nin, "and the time came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." It's a gentle reminder that we are always growing, or should be. I've been thinking a lot lately about who I was, who I am and who I want to be. During my 'yoga decade,' the ten years I taught yoga as a profession, I stepped into my power, but I also now see that I adhered to a certain ideal about who I thought I needed to be instead of really being me. I've lived "tight in a bud" most of…

  • being human,  stories

    Learning to Be a Better Me

    You ever go through so much change you don’t know who you are anymore? For me, a few difficult events led to a gradual process of huge transformation. And I didn’t even realize the magnitude of all I was going through until a friend pointed it out. She told me to stop, to be gentle, to give myself a little grace. I was so hard on myself prior to that, treating myself with little respect—a way I’d never treat another person. It took months following my mom’s death to put pieces of my heart back together. I'm still not 'the same.' I never will be; I don't think I'm supposed to be. But…

  • being human

    Do No Harm But Take No Shit

    Something I’m thinking about today, after a situation this weekend … I’m all about peace, love and light, but people with their own agendas who don’t listen and discard other people’s feelings, seriously piss me off. Sometimes I’m flabbergasted at the way people act, giving no thought to other people’s feelings. I talked with a close friend about the situation and she suggested I say something. “How can people change if they don’t know the things they do that hurt others?” I whole-heartedly agree, but given the relationship, it’s not my place to do the talking, and J (my husband) avoids conflict. He brought the situation up again last night, sorting out a remedy…

  • being human,  embodiment,  stories

    Writing to Discover the Truth

    I have a lump on the side of my breast. I discovered it three days ago, just after a boudoir shoot I did for my husband. I felt sexy, empowered, beautiful and strong, followed by every opposite emotion after discovering the lump. I have no idea what it is. Perhaps I have nothing to worry about; perhaps it will change my life. One rule of writing is to choose what you will say, how you will say it and how much to reveal. Writing for the self and writing for an audience are two entirely different things. Another rule of writing is to tell the truth.